squirreledaway

I kind of wanted to do a SOTU of my characters right now, since I don't think I've done that in awhile.

Judy is solid compared to where she was right before I dropped her. I'm not kidding. Tagging with her was like pulling teeth because all she really wanted to do was just... chill on the cliffs with no one else around her. Which makes it hard, because Judy is a very private person, and to be honest, no one was going to get her to give up what was wrong, except possibly Guy. And that was only if they really knew something was wrong. But going into the book was like an instant hit of perspective for her. So, she's been a lot easier to play.

Because she knows for a fact she can't do it herself. And when she came back, there were a lot of things that clicked. Sapphire being one of them, Guy's kind of. Special confession. And she feels more as though she belongs in Aather, now. It's to the point where, honestly, she feels more comfortable with Serene or Moonrise as her name. Not to say that Judith isn't important at all, but that it's a much more personal, painful reminder that she prefers not to dwell on for now.

Which, ironically, makes her feel bad sometimes. She doesn't like the feeling that she's given up on those feelings and her past, especially when she knows it was so important to her. But she also knows she can't honestly dwell on it, or she'd go back to avoiding everyone. And she doesn't want to put her friends through that, to be honest. So, it still bothers her, but she's in a better place because she knows that she can't just dwell. So, it's a little bit bottling her feelings, a little bit realizing she can't dwell, and a little just moving on. Which is fairly normal.

I am a bit sad about some of the distance that is coming between her and the Vesperia cast. Not to say that Yuri and Raven aren't important to her, but they are not as important to her as they would be in canon, because she still hesitates to tell them anything (which is mostly due to ONE SPECIFIC MEMORY BEING GONE). Which is creating a bit of a distance between them.

Which is why Lloyd has become the alternate party leader. That. She has his outfit for some reason. IDK MY BFF LLOYD FREAKING IRVING.

I am also kind of interested to see if her faith in Sapphire will be shaken when (since I am pretty sure this will happen) Van finds out about her casual feelings thing with Guy. Sapphire, despite Judith's opinions on the team, has been undeniably a good influence on Judith's time in Aather. Like, Sapphire developed under Mal's leadership, but I think the team has some pretty serious influences from other members. And they're all really good for her-- the only team I could see her functioning on as well is Emerald. And let's be honest, KK already has Judy's niche filled.

But if Van finds out and takes the petty route, I feel like that is something that could completely shake her attachment to the team if it goes on for long enough? Because Judith has already dealt with petty snipings from Excel, and she's grown less and less willing to deal with them as time has went on. So, I guess... I am kind of interested to see how that will play out, but for now I am chill with keeping Judy solid for a long while.

LOL. :'D EMIL'S UNION WOULD TAKE TO LONG TO STATE. So ask me questions if you want to know something in particular about him.

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How is your murderous rage doing, Ratatosk? ...also, what effect did their last conversation about ~liking yourself~ have?

His murderous rage is pretty good right now, actually. Which is a lot better than I expected after I dehiatused! But I think it's because Emil came back, then the game happened, and then Lloyd fought him. So, you know. I'm waiting to see how it plays out in the living together situation. Because. :'D Turq is not a team Ratatosk is intimately familiar with.

IT DIDN'T HAVE MUCH OF AN EFFECT, HONESTLY. Talking that way means little to Ratatosk. Like I said, he's all about force and fighting. Unless he has a predetermined attachment to you, like he does with Rose.

hey so what're your feelings on that crazy kid on peridot anyway

Lloyd finds Emil kind of frustrating and worrying but HE LIKES HIM :B he was honest in that he thinks both the side of Emil that gets angry about stuff and the side that tries to get brave enough to be angry about things and stops and reconsiders are endearing. He doesn't find death threats particularly endearing but it's kind of like looking at a baby sabertooth tiger or something. Gonna be a vicious predator someday but still cute now!

He is worried a little in that as long as the cast still thinks that Emil's personality change when Ratatosk comes out is an artificially produced phenomenon, it honestly just looks like Emil is relying on Ratatosk's power too much, to the point where he doesn't even like his normal self. That's gonna be a problem little bro :<a Are Ratatosk's views of humans being shaped any by the sheer number of people he's friendly with even when he's angry?

Hrmm... No, actually. It just means Ratatosk has a limited number of exceptions. And I mean EXTREMELY limited. Because he's hostile to a lot of Emil's friends at the drop of a hat. So, he chalks it up to, as he told Lloyd, that they prefer someone who is weak and spineless, and therefore really aren't worth his time. Because Ratatosk responds strongly to strength.

For instance, he seriously almost mauled Obi and Shirayuki, but Rose stopped him. And now he's... aware he can't just maul people randomly. At least for a few days, anyway. So that's another thing contributing to him reigning himself in.

What would Lloyd do if he saw Ratatosk about to attack some poor soul? :'D

Beat him up. :|a

Who does Ratatosk consider strong in Aather?

Hm... He considers Lucifer strong, honestly. Lloyd too, but Lloyd was on his pre-established shit list. And he grudgingly admits that Ven isn't that bad either.

I'm bad at questions. :|a you can just keep asking me things you want to know.

How hard are they trending towards disassociation? What are Emil's views on Ratatosk?

HAHAHAHA Ratatosk frightens Emil. Period dot. Ratatosk is part of the reason that Emil is having trouble sleeping, because he doesn't understand what triggers him. He is this looming part of Emil that Emil can't control (or feels he can't), and Emil can't even guarantee that he'll remember what Ratatosk does, since when he's out is mostly a haze by now to him.

Emil honestly doesn't know what to do about him. And he can't say anything out loud, or even really allow himself to dwell on it, because of how Ratatosk will know, and does know, and it's just like a huge wedge between them. The funny thing is, Emil agrees with Ratatosk's assessment of him, too! It's just. Oh my goodness.

So, they are worse, yet it's slowed, a little?

WHY IS RATATOSK FULL OF MURDEROUS RAGE

Because Mithos betrayed him :'D He had a lot of hope for Mithos and what he'd be able to accomplish, and then Mithos decided, instead, to go insane. And screwed over the very thing Ratatosk held most dear. SO WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS SEEING IS THE RESIDUALS FOR THAT. He didn't forget his rage, he just forgot the reason for it.

IF IT HELPS JUDY, Van is...slowly learning not to be petty. IT'S A SLOW PROCESS but I will try to be a decent human being for yooooou.

SHE'LL APPRECIATE IT, VAN.

SOTU?

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